ryan lever spills his guts

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Harry Gibbs, Sep 28, 2012.

  1. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    a pm i got from him. to honest not to share:

    "I managed to not only quit a normal dose of benzodiazepines, but, rather, an extremely high dose. My psychiatrist prescribed my pills for one month and I would go through them in half the time. Things got worse after that because even that high dose stopped being effective at treating my anxiety. I was to the point that I would take three clonazepam or ativan at a time.

    I suffer from severe anxiety, largely due to the abuse I did to my body through substance abuse in the past. I had a severe addiction to pain killers and benzodiazepines. At one point I actually crawled to the hospital and literally begged the doctors to give me pills after I had not slept for five days. They ended up giving me 2 pills of ativan, 1 mg, and sent me home to sleep. I was even worse after I took those pills.

    The withdrawals from benzodiazepines are the worst and they can actually kill you. I kicked benzos on my alone, alone, at home, without any help from doctors or the hospital. It was the hardest three months of my life. My system was in a terrible state of disequilibrium after six to seven years of heavy benzo use. I actually contemplated suicide. That's how bad it was. I ultimately went to the doctor and was prescribed Seroquel, 150 mg, bid. That dose keeps me from suffering."
     
  2. Shivvy

    Shivvy Well-Known Member

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    he's a good dude
     
  3. geo

    geo Well-Known Member

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    you fat fucking liar. he can't make paragraphs.:hat:
     
  4. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    dude's been through a lot. pill doctors push those benzos an don't care that they ruin lifes.
     
  5. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    no sister, for realzies. i think he plays around with his writing. anything he's ever sent me has been legit like that pm i posted above.
     
  6. geo

    geo Well-Known Member

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    dude i'm trying to figure where you're going with this one :coffee:
     
  7. Shivvy

    Shivvy Well-Known Member

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    lever, if you got any xanax, pm me. I'll send you cash
     
  8. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    i don't even understand what you mean? the guy sent me that in a pm. that's it an that's all.
     
  9. geo

    geo Well-Known Member

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    ok then dink. :nojj:
     
  10. Ryan Lever

    Ryan Lever Well-Known Member

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  11. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    here's a cool duckling.
    [​IMG]
     
  12. FatKidSullivan

    FatKidSullivan Smoking Cigars

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    That duckling has spunk. I like him.
     
  13. Harry Gibbs

    Harry Gibbs the boss of all men

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    god damnit i got a shower an get ready for work. lever if you want that removed let dawg know. i didn't post it to embarrass you or nothing.
     
  14. Ryan Lever

    Ryan Lever Well-Known Member

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    Nope been TOTALLY clean off benzos since the videos I posted in full detox. It was at least 2-3 weeks of SEVERE over the top every symptom you can name I had. I wanted to kill myself during that time but was strong enough to realize if I do then the pill wins and the worst part was these were prescribed medication which was supposed to help me but they never did they just made me 100 times worse.
     
  15. HaroldJackson

    HaroldJackson Well-Known Member

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    Lever knows the word disequalibrium?
     
  16. geo

    geo Well-Known Member

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    how can i make that my av?
     
  17. Cheri

    Cheri Skunk VIP

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    Why would you post a PM like that?
     
  18. Ryan Lever

    Ryan Lever Well-Known Member

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    Please watch to see how sick I really looked coming off this medication. This was the fifth day of COLD turkey from a drug which is so severe to come off of it literally unbearable. For the first 3-4 days of full detox I slept not at all I crawled into my local hospital emergency room barely able to speak. They informed me the worst of it would be over within 5 days which turns out was a lie. They actually sent me home to detox in such a state I was hearing stuff and was getting psychotic breaks. I went out into the middle of the street and was screaming is all I remember the first day coming off. I was screaming come and arrest me and take me to the hospital please because I am suffering. That did not work so I went and tried drinking a 26er of rum strait. Keeping in mind I am a small man I managed to drink a full 26er in 5 hours out of the bottle and was still unable to pass myself out. You know your body and brain is fucked when you drink a 26er in 5 hours and it wont even make you fall asleep.
     
  19. Ryan Lever

    Ryan Lever Well-Known Member

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    [video=youtube;9sXqP9RJK3M]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9sXqP9RJK3M[/video]

    Video is here sorry it will still not let me post a video and a message at the same time.
     
  20. Ryan Lever

    Ryan Lever Well-Known Member

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    I was being honest just did not know it would get posted. Actually makes me kind of happy he posted it just verified everything I said.