So Today Is My Birthday...

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by dexterdog, Aug 8, 2015.

  1. dexterdog

    dexterdog Well-Known Member

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    ...and it's been my wish over the last few years that I not get any gifts or "surprise" parties or anything of that nature. I have everything I need and I really don't need to celebrate getting a year older. To me it's just another day.
    So this morning I'm in the kitchen pouring myself a cup of coffee and I was ready to go out on the back deck and sit for a while and just enjoy a beautiful summer day. My wife intercepts me and asks me to sit down at the kitchen table, and I know what's coming. She simply couldn't let the day pass without getting me something.
    I meekly protest but sit. She presents me with one of those gift bags from the dollar store and I reach in and one by one I unwrap a barbeque brush, a jar of peanuts, some chocolates, a couple of scratch tickets...
    Ok fine, I thank her, it was no big deal a few little things just to acknowledge my birthday. I stand up and go over to her and kiss her on the forehead. She tells me to sit back down.
    She pulls out a small box she was hiding and I sit to tear off the paper. I look down and see a Sirius satellite radio car kit staring back at me. I'm thinking maybe she's used an old box to throw me off and there's something else inside...
    No, it's a brand new Sirius radio.
    About six months ago I cancelled my Sirius subscription. Apparently she though my radio was "broken" so she thought it would be a great idea to get me a new one. Mental face palm, and I was hoping it didn't show on my face. I spend a lot of time in the car for work so this gave her the incentive to replace my seemingly broken but voluntarily disconnected radio.
    So happy birthday to me. And by the way, my step-kids chipped in for a one year paid subscription...:facepalm:
     
  2. Mr Vengeance

    Mr Vengeance Ladies love cool V. VIP

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    See, using Howie-math, because your wife gave you the radio, and the step kids paid for the sub, that's (2+ number of step-kids) new listeners. Someone call Buchwald, time to sue Sirius again!!!
     
  3. Roland Schwinn

    Roland Schwinn *Likes reported as of October 14, 2016 Gold

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    Happy birthday none the less! :party:
     
  4. GIRLY

    GIRLY OV

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  5. Quality Control

    Quality Control dove Gold

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    Happy birthday!
     
  6. Pooh bear

    Pooh bear Well-Known Member VIP

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    Happy birthday!
    That was very sweet of your wife-take her out to dinner Birthday Boy!
    :bday:
     
  7. Bye You!

    Bye You! The n word guy Gold

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    She's sweet. Happy birthday!
     
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  8. Bristol Chicken

    Bristol Chicken Free Range and Loving It Gold

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    Install it, start the subscription, and enjoy the music, sports, comedy, etc.
    I personally miss the 70's, hair nation, Elvis, classic rock.

    Do not succumb to the temptation to listen to 'those' 2 channels. Do not put them on speed dial.
    Every time you get the urge to check, repeat this chant: "another fucking cat picture, another fucking cat picture, another fucking cat picture, another fucking cat picture".
     
  9. RF76

    RF76 Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like a good wife, be thankful

    Happy birthday
     
  10. Rob0729

    Rob0729 Well-Known Member

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    Happy birthday! But if she gave you a Sirius radio, I think she adhered to the no gift request in my book.
     
  11. WUT7272G7C

    WUT7272G7C Space Chimp

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    Your wife cares. That's a great everyday-present :)
    Happy Birthday, yo
     
  12. EmperorsNewCaps

    EmperorsNewCaps Member

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    You should probably communicate your disdain of the Wig with the wife more, no?

    I mean the overwhelming argument here is going to be it's sweet and she cares. The positive perspective. But from my negative, more realistic perspective, wifey doesn't know wtf is going on with you. Why doesn't she?
     
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  13. cg256

    cg256 Well-Known Member VIP

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  14. smichal

    smichal A1 Dick Game

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    Happy birthday...
    at least you can listen to the other channels...
    just don't activate wiggy
     
  15. 1Vegasgirl

    1Vegasgirl Well-Known Member VIP Gold

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    She's a keeper. What a kind, thoughtful thing for her to do.

    Think of all the fun on here now.:)

    Oh, and Happy, Happy, Birthday.
     
  16. Dump Button

    Dump Button Former Mall Security Guard

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    Happy B-Day Grinch :)

    Sometimes people like showing their appreciation for you
     
  17. Krinkle

    Krinkle What?

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    :bday:

    The second time she told you to sit down, I was hoping for a cool blow job story.

    But it didn't happen.....

    [​IMG]
     
  18. Calloused Shins

    Calloused Shins Well-Known Member

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    Look at the bright side, you prob won $2.00 with your lotto cards
     
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  19. PI Nate

    PI Nate Disenfranchised since 1984... Gold

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    Happy Birthday!!

    :clap:
     
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  20. Dump Button

    Dump Button Former Mall Security Guard

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    Have you played the scratch tix yet? i have developed a gambling problem with them and I am having the time of my life