Shop Now At Amazon

Some sexual tips for you men trying to get it right.

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Slippy, Nov 18, 2012.

  1. Slippy

    Slippy Active Member VIP

    Reputations:
    442
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    31,388
    Likes Received:
    14
    When you choke a bitch out...don't rest your 200 lbs against her chest bone. Makes us sore for days.

    When we're getting "close" - don't suddenly decide to switch up the pace or position. Then we gotta start all over again.

    Don't fucking narrate...that's just irritating.

    S'all I got for the moment, but I'm sure I'll think of a few more.
     
  2. Sponsor

    Sponsor

    Reputations:
    0
     
  3. cheezedbyfate

    cheezedbyfate Active Member

    Reputations:
    18
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    5,385
    Likes Received:
    7
    can i nut now???
     
  4. Mojopin

    Mojopin Average Member VIP

    Reputations:
    5,543
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    9,156
    Likes Received:
    614
    I have no interest in ckokin' a bitch.

    You're freaky.
     
  5. Babs

    Babs Lolly VIP

    Reputations:
    18,339
    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2012
    Messages:
    38,750
    Likes Received:
    1,284
    Do what we tell ya to. that is all.
     
  6. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    76,525
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2012
    Messages:
    35,724
    Likes Received:
    1,365
    Tips for Slippy for when I bang you:

    1) Shut the fuck up and bend over.
    2) You don't tell me shit. I tell you and you do it.
    3) Don't complain about the ice cold beer that is resting on your ass while I bang you doggy style.
    4) If it gets in your eyes, I meant to shoot it in your eyes. Deal with it.
     
  7. Billy

    Billy FHRITP VIP

    Reputations:
    7,530
    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2011
    Messages:
    28,326
    Likes Received:
    401
    You're boring. Chicks love that.
     
  8. Mojopin

    Mojopin Average Member VIP

    Reputations:
    5,543
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    9,156
    Likes Received:
    614
    I'm ok with that. Violent sex is not my thing.
     
  9. Slippy

    Slippy Active Member VIP

    Reputations:
    442
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    31,388
    Likes Received:
    14
    oooooo...another one: If you goddamn know you aren't going to finish, don't keep pounding us like a cut of veal. Let it go and save it up for the next round.
     
  10. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    76,525
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2012
    Messages:
    35,724
    Likes Received:
    1,365
    I don't understand the concept of not finishing. I'm not kidding.
     
  11. hidden dragon

    hidden dragon throwing bricks VIP

    Reputations:
    32,181
    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2012
    Messages:
    43,752
    Likes Received:
    1,291
    Yeah, that is annoying.
     
  12. FatKidSullivan

    FatKidSullivan Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    7,316
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    20,293
    Likes Received:
    1,126
    The only girl who ever asked me to choke her was batshit fucking insane. I was afraid I was going to murder her. I've asked friends, and they say the same. It's weird.
     
  13. Reggae Mistress

    Reggae Mistress VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    188,313
    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2012
    Messages:
    19,989
    Likes Received:
    1,947
    Tell em, Sista!
     
  14. FtM

    FtM Starless & Bible Black Gold

    Reputations:
    7,632
    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2011
    Messages:
    42,800
    Likes Received:
    672
    Ummmm...I'm fairly vanilla with a bit of light pain-related stuff like spanking, biting, and scratching.

    I will add this...

    If you're going to pull a woman's hair, only grab the hair at the nape of the neck.

    If you don't eat pussy or have sex with a woman on her period, you should just give up and PM Mario pictures of your junk.
     
  15. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

    Reputations:
    10,576
    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2011
    Messages:
    31,294
    Likes Received:
    129
    choking should be done from behind. done from in front you either lean on the girl or you fall on her. ruin the mood.

    i always wonder about those porno films where just as the girl is about to cum, the guy takes a breather. that's got to be frustrating for both of them.

    I also hate when the girls "direct". only sounds should be coming out of the girls' mouth not sentences, questions, or detailed directions.

    if i'm doing it right you should only be able to scream, moan, and cry "oh god". anything else means its time to watch tv.
     
  16. GHP

    GHP New Member Shot Dead

    Reputations:
    25
    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2010
    Messages:
    40,385
    Likes Received:
    2
    If you want to fuck my sister just say so. I'll set up a threesome
     
  17. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    76,525
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2012
    Messages:
    35,724
    Likes Received:
    1,365
    Plenty of chicks like that. The degree of choking is a whole different matter.
     
  18. Mojopin

    Mojopin Average Member VIP

    Reputations:
    5,543
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    9,156
    Likes Received:
    614
    Agreed
     
  19. Slippy

    Slippy Active Member VIP

    Reputations:
    442
    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2010
    Messages:
    31,388
    Likes Received:
    14
    Tips for Popeye:

    Best wear a helmet and elbow pads and shinpads, with an attitude like that.

    Limber up before-hand, as well. Nobody needs to pull a groin muscle. That shit hurts.
     
  20. Mojopin

    Mojopin Average Member VIP

    Reputations:
    5,543
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    9,156
    Likes Received:
    614
    In
     
  21. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

    Reputations:
    10,576
    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2011
    Messages:
    31,294
    Likes Received:
    129
    you knew chiva's ex-gf?
     

Share This Page