The Comedy Central Roast of Howard Stern

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by porker159, Jul 17, 2014.

  1. porker159

    porker159 Member

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    Will Howard ever agree to take the punishment? 10 years from now, when he’s off the radio, failed on television and desperate for attention?


    ---


    Howard Stern, you are the reason I got into comedy, and the reason I will never get plastic surgery. Look at yourself, your personality is only like the 5th most disgusting thing about you.


    But seriously Howard, you should be happy you’re ugly... at least now you know *for sure* Beth married you for your money.


    I’m just kidding, Beth is an amazing girl. And she’s very educated! Apparently, Ostrosky is polish for gold digging cunt.


    Howard, I heard a rumor... Is it true that the only reason Beth married you is because she wanted to be more famous than Seabiscuit?


    I’m just kidding, I do really admire that Beth has rescued so many unwanted animals. Most people stick to cats and dogs, but you’ve really gotta give her credit for starting with an ostrich.


    Seriously, if Beth loves adopting animals so much, why didn’t she start with that thing on your fucking head?


    What’s it like knowing that your hair is literally the funniest thing about you?


    I’m just kidding Howard, we all know your radio show has never been better. Bobo, King of all Blacks and Mariann from Brooklyn told me so.


    Howard, come on. What happened? You used to be the King of All Media. Now the media is bigger than your audience.


    And now you’re a judge on AGT, where you have surrounded yourself with sooo many talented people. Why didn’t you start 20 years ago?


    C’mon Howie. Your co-host is Robin Quivers, your producer is Gary Dell’Abate, and your joke writer is Benjy Bronk. Some jokes fucking write themselves.
     
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  2. Harambe Burrito

    Harambe Burrito Intelligent, average dick size and sensational Gold

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    Pletty veak, blo.
     
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  3. Joe Bauers

    Joe Bauers Well-Known Member

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    Never Happen :no:
     
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  4. StRyDeRxX

    StRyDeRxX Bling Bling Gold

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    Agreed. Howard can dish it out all day long but the minute you goof on him he melts. He would never agree to a roast...

    [​IMG]
     
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  5. Ta Ta Toothy

    Ta Ta Toothy Well-Known Member

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    This.

    1) Howard would dictate too many topics off limits (the wig, Beth, his hideous plastic surgery, his fake choppers, etc.). There would be so little left to mock that the comedians would all be forced to do the same material.

    2) Howard would want the lions share of marbles. Comedy Central would lose money.

    3) Who would watch? The grandma's and "alleged" children who tune into AGT? I don't think so [said in my best Jerry Sienfeld mocking voice]
     
  6. BrerJimmy

    BrerJimmy Well-Known Member

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    Never. Remember when Private Parts came out and he could have legitimately hosted SNL? I don't doubt that he was approached, but he insisted upon circumventing SNL's writers and writing the show himself with Fred and Jackie.

    He'd never relinquish control.

    Even when he goes on Letterman and the like, he always dictates the interview, turning the focus back upon the host.

    Way too afraid of not being control or being exposed.
     
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  7. Beer Chugger

    Beer Chugger Well-Known Member

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    At least you got one pretty good one in
     
  8. Stern68

    Stern68 mult Banned User

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    if an event like that were to happen it wouldn't be on Comedy Central, at minimum network TV, most likely Pay Per View.
     
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  9. cah155

    cah155 Well-Known Member

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    It would be filmed, sit on a shelf for months on end waiting for someone to buy it, then be put on Sirius for free
     
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  10. puncher

    puncher VIP Extreme Gold

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    Howie wouldn't agree to do it, and if he did agree....he would pick comedians that would do lame, safe jokes about him. These roasts have sucked lately...the Franco roast was filled with all his ass-kissing buddies, and the Roseanne was filled with a bunch of comedians that she picked out and that played safe with her. The only way these roasts are funny is when the celebrity has no idea who is going to roast him, and anything goes....like the Flavor Flav, Hasslehoff, Trump, and others.

    Still...Howie would never agree to it.
     
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  11. Rob0729

    Rob0729 Well-Known Member

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    Remember Gary claims the original idea for the birthday show was a roast of Howard and then they decided it would be a much better show if it was a "Kennedy Center Tribute" of Howard. In other words, they pitched a roast to Howard and he said no way.

    Neither Howard nor Beth have a sense of humor about themselves. Neither can take jabs about themselves.
     
  12. YokoOhNo

    YokoOhNo Well-Known Member

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    he couldn't handle this, he can't take it...and can barely dish it out anymore.

    [​IMG]
     
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  13. NotMyBro

    NotMyBro VIP Extreme Gold

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    These were actually pretty good! I laughed.
     
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  14. itsawig

    itsawig Well-Known Member

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    It would be filmed and shown in movie theaters, set all box office records and sweep the academy awards. Why are are you lowballing the king, stern68? You better start doubling the meds or you are going find yourself without your imaginary , transgender, wig wearing friend!
     
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  15. Dreamking

    Dreamking The dogs of doom are howlin' low...

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    The range of possible insults to Howard and Beth are what we in the military call a "Target Rich Environment"....
     
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  16. wigtropolis

    wigtropolis Well-Known Member

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    you are my favorite poster , cocksucker