The Dead Dan Story

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by LonghornJ, Oct 31, 2015.

  1. LonghornJ

    LonghornJ VIP Extreme Gold

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    Happy anniversary mutt, wherever you are
     
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  2. doughhead63

    doughhead63 OD'd on life itself Staff Member

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    That was a cool tradition.
     
  3. freds

    freds you broke it VIP

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    Mutt was no Stephen King.
     
  4. doughhead63

    doughhead63 OD'd on life itself Staff Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  5. LonghornJ

    LonghornJ VIP Extreme Gold

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    Tomorrow is Oct 10th. This is a day that holds meaning to me as Dead Dan Day. It's the night that I was scared shitless when I found a headless guy in my driveway. It was back when I still lived in the Pocono mountains, and my place was 1/2 a mile off the road back on the Delaware River. Believe me that nobody was going out to the keg-a-rator on the back porch by themselves that night. Not with the cops searching the woods all night for the killer. I'll never forget it and plan on heading out to the bar in honor of that poor guy who was shot in the back of the head with a shotgun.

    :doa: :se:

    I think my favorite quote from the night was when I asked one of the cops if they had found the guys head yet. He says "You shouldn't even be here" then turns his flashlight up to the trunk of the car and pans the flashlight across my driveway, across the bushes, and up into the trees while saying, "Theres some, theres some, theres some more...." you get the idea. It wasn't until then that I realized I had been standing in the mess that used to be his head when I found him, and that we had dragged that mess into the house when we called the cops. (nice huh?)

    Days later when the police cleared out, they had the fire department come out and hose everything down, (which was nice and all) but it just caused this big dark mud puddle with floaties all in it. that head floatie puddle stuck around for ever. Every time it looked like it might finally dry up, it would rain again. It was a constant reminder and a great way to point out to people where it had happened.

    Needless to say, i didn't make in to teach that next day. We just hung out all night in my bar by the wood burning stove, bullshitting with the few neighbors we had.

    As weird as this story is, I wish I was back in that house now. It was one kick ass place, and besides I could go down to the spot where it happened and make a little fire and down beers while i freak myself out listing to the Halloween soundtrack again. Probably wouldn't have the same impact as it did that Halloween, but would be fun none the less.

    -----------------------------------------------

    it is a true story. the only reason I moved is that several years ago we had 3 feet of snow and then one day it was 70 and rained all day. by the time i went to bed all of the snow had melted. the river has a mountain on either side of it and all the snow all the way up the river melted as well. the river rose 24 feet that night and the house was no more. I watched as big ass chunks of ice crashed into my deck and pool. The house was fucked and I was homeless for 2 weeks. thats a whole other story though. lota shit happened at the river house. tomorrow I'll post more details about Dead Dan, but I'll tell you that I slept with my gun for the next couple weeks.

    ------------------------------------------------

    I'm off to bed, but before I go here is some more of the Dead Dan Story. I skipped past the beginning last time so I'll back up a little

    I'm on the phone Oct 10th several years ago, when I hear a shot gun echo thru the water gap. There are mountains on either side of the Delaware and sound would echo back and forth across the river. We would always hear gun fire, the state game lands were on the jersey side of the river, but this time it was different. loud and deep. So loud that the person on the other end of the phone heard it. It seemed strange, but nothing to be concerned with. I went to bed around 10 as my roommate was leaving for a frat party. (I was student teaching at the time and had to be up early)

    Not long after he left, he's back and comes running into my room. "Jeff get up! Get your gun!" I'm all confused and disoriented, but he sure as hell had my attention. He told me that someone was in the driveway. He thought something was up. Said he heard people in the woods and some guy was laying next to his car in the driveway. He said that he thought the guy "was playin possum" , and that he might get jumped if he went over to help the guy.(this guy was from NYC so god knows where he picked up that jed clampet phrase) So I get dress, and we search the house for a working flashlight. None! (go buy batteries now folks) I get my 22 riffle (yeah i know, what the hell was I gonna do with that. we used it to shoot cans, I'm not even sure it would slow you down unless you pressed it up against the guys temple before you pulled the trigger) We hopped in his car and drove down to where Dead Dan was parked. (the driveway was a 1/2 mile long and for some odd reason had a real old small cemetery on it. the driveway was part of Shawnee Ski resort's property right where the horse trail are and there was an old church and cemetery out near the road, and no I'm not making this up) the car was parked off to the side at the cemetery the leaves hadn't fallen yet. they were blocking out the moon, and it was real dark. we positioned the car the best we could to light the area, but he was on the far side of the car and all we could do was shine the headlights at the car, with some light shinning under it. We each went around opposite ends of the car. I was right up against a wall and my roommate had me all paranoid about people in the woods. I was at the drivers side front of the car and he was at the rear. I had the riffle pointed at the guy on the ground and was yelling the whole time "hey buddy! you alright?" He wasn't moving or making any sound. I could only see knee to waist of his jeans and the rest was in the dark. i couldn't even really tell how he was laying. I kept thinking to myself that if this was some asshole playing a joke, if he startles me, i might shoot him by accident. He'd be one dumb taking the joke too far bastard then. I inched forward and tried nudging him with my boot. I never came in contact with him. I couldn't tell how he was laying and after feeling around for him without finding anything, i was totally freaked. My roommate was back at the car looking for a flashlight. When I realized I was down it the dark by myself, nobody watching my back, It was time to get the fuck out of there. As I headed back to the car, my roommate was heading back to the body. He had found a penlight flashlight. I got up and started to follow him, but by then he had turned on the light and was running back to his car screamin. "get in the car, he has no fucking head!" I wasn't sure what was going on, but after hearing the guy had no head several times, I jumped in the car.
     
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  6. Neesie

    Neesie Princess Parliaments VIP Gold

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  7. freds

    freds you broke it VIP

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    Mutt either plagiarized it or had someone edit for typos. dude couldn't spell "cat."
     
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  8. DrivenByDemons

    DrivenByDemons Spinoff Jesus Staff Member

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    :jj:
     
  9. LonghornJ

    LonghornJ VIP Extreme Gold

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    Bump
     
  10. PLZ callmeTED

    PLZ callmeTED National Treasure Gold

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    What the fuck was that about?
     
  11. Capn Crud

    Capn Crud The Pride of Cucamonga VIP Gold

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    tl dr

    did the fat guy die?
     
  12. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter

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  13. Schmoopy

    Schmoopy Shit Mult Hunter

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    Never heard that story. Must've been before I signed-up.
     
  14. Lemmy

    Lemmy Douchebag Extraordinaire Gold

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    I was hoping this thread was about AG. :pissed: