The Donald is the Healthiest Human Being Ever

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Robert Higgins, Dec 14, 2015.

  1. Robert Higgins

    Robert Higgins Well-Known Member VIP

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    Donald Trump Releases Medical Report Calling His Health ‘Extraordinary’

    Donald J. Trump released a note from his personal physician attesting that his health was “extraordinary.”

    The note, signed by Dr. Harold Bornstein, of Lenox Hill Hospital, was four paragraphs long and contained as few specifics as many of Mr. Trump’s policy proposals. But the note made a sweeping declaration in a tone oddly similar to how Mr. Trump talks about himself.

    “If elected, Mr. Trump, I can state unequivocally, will be the healthiest individual ever elected to the presidency,” Dr. Bornstein wrote in the final paragraph.

    The note came 11 days after Mr. Trump vowed on Twitter to release a “full medical report” about his physical health and fitness to serve as president, which he said would “show perfection.” His pledge came after a Politico reportpointed out his penchant for fatty foods, his lack of routine workouts, and, until now, his refusal to release a medical report.

    I am proud to share this health report, written by the highly respected Dr. Jacob Bornstein of Lenox Hill Hospital. https://t.co/5RZa5of0TR

    — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 14, 2015



    The note begins as an open letter, “To Whom My Concern,” apparently meaning, “To whom it may concern.” The email from Mr. Trump that contained the note said it was from his doctor, Jacob, which he also posted on Twitter. According to an obituary, Jacob Bornstein died in 2010; the note lists Jacob Bornstein as Mr. Trump’s previous physician.

    The note said that Mr. Trump had a “recent complete medical examination that showed only positive results.” It did not give specifics about that exam.

    Over the past 39 years, the note said, Mr. Trump has had “no significant medical problems.” His blood pressure, 110/65, was “astonishingly excellent,” the note added. He has lost “at least fifteen pounds” in the last 12 months, although his exact weight was not listed. He also takes a low-dose aspirin daily and a statin to treat high cholesterol, but the note did not contain his cholesterol levels. The note said Mr. Trump had no history of cancer or joint surgery, and did not use tobacco or alcohol products. It said he has a PSA level of 0.15, which is unusually low.

    “His physical strength and stamina are extraordinary,” the note added.

    Strength and stamina are the same words Mr. Trump has used to tar Hillary Clinton, who is leading in polls for the Democratic presidential nomination. Mrs. Clinton months ago released a lengthy doctor’s note that included information about her concussion in December 2012 and her recovery.



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    http://www.nytimes.com/politics/fir...ical-report-calling-his-health-extraordinary/

    http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/12/14/the-donald-s-trumped-up-medical-report.html



    Dr Harold Bornstein

    [​IMG]
     
  2. Quality Control

    Quality Control dove

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    His skin looks like wet cat food.
     
  3. BethSucks

    BethSucks Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    He has that orange glow of health.
     
  4. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn Well-Known Member

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  5. dawg

    dawg In The Dog House Staff Member

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    The clown show just keeps getting better :jj:
     
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  6. FishySausage

    FishySausage In Robin’s fridge VIP

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    You can't make this shit up.
    I really hope he wins the nomination.
    I could use a year of comedy
     
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  7. Winston Leg-Thigh

    Winston Leg-Thigh Well-Known Member

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    A high level of fitness is required because he'll have to do very important shit like play 36 holes of golf 300 days a year.
     
  8. Jayla

    Jayla It's not my circus, not my monkeys Gold

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    ADORE your av. :)
     
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  9. MilkyDischarge

    MilkyDischarge The "Fuckin' cockroach infestation!"

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    His sexual drive is unprecedented. He has the virility of a mighty stallion, the cock of a porn star, and a load more weighty than a gallon of heavy gloss paint.
     
  10. TeeDonkey

    TeeDonkey Well-Known Member VIP

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    Let me tell ya how terrific my health is, it's so terrific, I won't get into details but let me tell you, I have terrific health.

    Trump.



    :usflag:
     
  11. ltd86

    ltd86 Racist Banned User

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    OMG Trump is healthy! What a clown! Why can't he be sickly and brain damaged like this harridan?!?!

    [​IMG]
     
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  12. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
    "honey, grandma's scaring the grand kids again!"
     
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  13. beanporn

    beanporn Well-Known Member

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    I'm starting to get the Kim Jong Un vibe from trump...maybe even a little Baghdad Bob. This guy uses hyperbole like I use toilet paper, constant and it's covered with shit.
     
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  14. RoachCoachJokes

    RoachCoachJokes Well-Known Member

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    Instead of the promised "full health report," this is what we get? Man what a huckster.

    Daily doses of aspirin and statin definitely does NOT jibe with "excellent cardiovascular status."

    The general used-car salesman flavour of hyperbole, and limited grammar, suggests that this was in fact ghost-written by Chump himself.
     
  15. Rhinosaucerous

    Rhinosaucerous Uncle Riley

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    He's NEVER had a sip of alcohol in his life? He's NEVER had a cigar before?

    "I mean, what is this?"
    image.jpeg
     
    Last edited: Dec 14, 2015
  16. lastlaugh

    lastlaugh Well-Known Member

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    The Donald takes in his B-12.
     
  17. Time Bandit

    Time Bandit Well-Known Member

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    this is a surreptitious affront to hillary's headaches, I think that was the complaint..
    she got out of congressional hearing testimony because she was faint or something as I recall.
     
  18. Time Bandit

    Time Bandit Well-Known Member

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    I use to go to this doctor and get him out of the room by asking for a B12 shot.
    I knew where he kept his extra script pads and would snatch a wad off the pad.
    I filled them out for Quaaludes and go fill the scripts at pharmacies he owned..
    I wish I knew then how good I had it
     
  19. DiamondGoddess

    DiamondGoddess Born Ready for My Close-Up! Gold

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    Trump's health is yooge!!!

    Would expect him to have a more GQ doc like that dude who did the Today show with Charlie Sheen.

    How many STDa has he had, Doc?

    lol
     
  20. Getthepoisonout

    Getthepoisonout I regret my username

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    He is a bit overweight, his turkey neck is full of fatty deposits in his arteries. I think he could drop dead at any moment. Please remember my post if it happens, it want the accolades for calling it early.