The Story of Larrymas

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Dorb, Dec 23, 2015.

  1. Dorb

    Dorb Sad Old Faggit Gold

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    In the days of old, Emperor Vincent declared that all would descend upon Southern Michigan, and that 93,137 would be counted.

    And because the parents were Hogan marks and also fans of The Macho Man, they traveled to Pontiac to be amongst those in attendance. This they did although the mother was pregnant.

    When they got to Detroit, they discovered that there was no Penthouse available at the Westin Book Cadillac. So there, in a humble ninth floor deluxe suite at The Henry in Dearborn, the Lawyer was born.

    That day, there were marks tailgating in the Silverdome parking lot. Suddenly @ljc appeared among them, and the rub off the Lawyer's glory surrounded them. And @ljc said "Listen up you little dickless asswipes! For today, the Lawyer, the future CEO and Chairman of Larry Inc. has been born in this godforsaken, shithole town. And you will recognize him because he's the only baby in Michigan lying on 3000 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets, wearing a Ribera's Steakhouse jacket, and chugging Natty Lights."

    Suddenly @ljc was joined by @MrPPV and @tradioguy69 , praising the Lawyer and saying "The fact of the matter is this - Larry Inc. will do what we want, when we want, how we want, to whoever we want to!"

    When the boys returned back to Larry Inc. World Headquarters, the jabroni marks said to each other "we gotta go see this shit!"

    They hurried to The Henry in Dearborn and found the parents. And there was the Lawyer, watching World Championship Wrestling on TBS, lying on 3000 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets, wearing a Ribera's Steakhouse jacket, and calling @ClintDagger and @EDDIEVRULZ about lining up some top shelf ring rats for that night. After seeing him, they popped huge and marked the fuck out.

    The jobbers returned to the Silverdome just as King Kong Bundy was beating the shit out of some midgets. They told everyone what they had seen. And everyone that heard the story popped huge and marked the fuck out. All of them knew that they had been witness to the very personification of greatness.
     
  2. ClintDagger

    ClintDagger The REAL Nature Boy - Exec VP Larry, Inc VIP

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    You Bar peeps need some Larrymas Cheer!
     
  3. Slow

    Slow Well-Known Member Banned User

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    The bar posters when they are overcome with emotion reading this beautiful story

    [​IMG]
     
  4. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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  5. Gitfiddle

    Gitfiddle Live Deliciously

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    [​IMG]
     
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  6. ClintDagger

    ClintDagger The REAL Nature Boy - Exec VP Larry, Inc VIP

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    Tonight I remember our good friend @EmperorsNewCaps, who is either dead or in the rafters. His own crew got him, he never saw it coming.

    [​IMG]

    His death must be avenged!
     
  7. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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    What the fuckery is this retarded nonsense?
     
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  8. Gitfiddle

    Gitfiddle Live Deliciously

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    [​IMG]
     
  9. Slow

    Slow Well-Known Member Banned User

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    The story of larrymas may have been tldr for the bar patrons. They usually max out at a single 5 word sentence. You might have to break it down to gif form
     
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  10. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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    Who left the fucking door open? Look at whats coming into the bar. Someone get a broom and clean this up.
     
  11. O Face

    O Face VIP Extreme Gold

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    :pray:
     
  12. artiesoffspring

    artiesoffspring Hugs and Kisses Gold

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    The nWo was much better than this.
     
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  13. Capn Crud

    Capn Crud The pride of Cucamonga VIP

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    [​IMG]
     
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  14. Slow

    Slow Well-Known Member Banned User

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    [​IMG]
     
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  15. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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    :lol:
     
  16. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal Welcome to my underground lair.

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    My lord and savior is Awesome Kong.
     
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  17. larryluncg

    larryluncg Birthdays were the worst days VIP Gold

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    Shut the fuck up


    You did this thread more than once. It wasn't funny the first time.
     
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  18. A Succulent Chinese Meal

    A Succulent Chinese Meal Welcome to my underground lair.

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    Larry vs Larry
     
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  19. Gitfiddle

    Gitfiddle Live Deliciously

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    I fucking want a Music Band shirt.
     
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  20. Slow

    Slow Well-Known Member Banned User

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    Who ya got coming out alive?
    [​IMG]
     
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