The two best "I'm older than dirt and twice as senile as Imus" moments this week....

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Chuck Kongo, Mar 27, 2013.

  1. Chuck Kongo

    Chuck Kongo Well-Known Member

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    1. Howard thinks he remembers watching Lenny Dykstra play for the Mets when he was a "child"....of 32 or so...lmfao.

    2. While listening to and discussing ZZ Top songs, Robin blurts out "Oh, legs!" and Grandpa Stern, half-deaf old fogey that he already is (and whatever he can still hear probably drowned out by his own constant on-air lip smacking and sniffling) thinks she said "Meg" and starts to go into his long boring, fucking broken record, done it 5000 times already spiel about Meg Griffin who only played obscure music and wouldn't give him the time of day because he didn't know her obscure music, and he wanted her so bad and blah-blah-blah, yadda-yadda-yadda, ect., ect., ect........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz........

    Thankfully, Robin shouted "Play Legs" and it snapped him out of his old fuck fog and we were spared that goddamn hooey again...until the next time.

    Shit like this is why I still listen to a guy I mostly despise now, and you just can't script these kinds of lulz.

    "Have I ever told you about the time I worked with Meg Griffin...."

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    Last edited: Mar 28, 2013
  2. NoddinOff

    NoddinOff New Member Banned User

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    I just sat on my nuts
     
  3. Ruffypup

    Ruffypup Well-Known Member

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    Debbie the Pet Lady was on the phone and asked Howard if he called her, Howard said yes. Debbie said I forgot my question, Howard said "Well, you're the caller", Debbie said "hold on" , Howard hung up
     
  4. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn HateClub

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  5. 50Foundation

    50Foundation Member

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    His stupid fucking "they don't make em like this anymore" made me hate him that much more. Something that all old people say about subsequent generations that is wholly untrue. There is just as good as much around as ZZ Top. Don't get me wrong--ZZ Top was a great band but their sound is dusty as hell.
     
  6. NotMyBro

    NotMyBro VIP Extreme Gold

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    :grouch:he's a crotchety old man.
     
  7. SouthernListen

    SouthernListen I don't follow the crowd. Sorry about that. VIP

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    Huge Bieber fan, eh?
     
  8. j shmuck

    j shmuck Well-Known Member

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    Took that huge staff a few meetings to coordinate that bit too
     
  9. Mugsysam

    Mugsysam Active Member

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    Howard when Beth leaves the house..........

    [video=youtube;_zDybR3LY1k]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_zDybR3LY1k[/video]
     
  10. TheLACritic

    TheLACritic Well-Known Member VIP

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    Or when Howard thought Benjy said Anna Nicole Smith was in a new commercial after she died and not her daughter.
     
  11. Time Bandit

    Time Bandit Well-Known Member

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    I like some fairly current songs and I'm howard's age..
    one goes "I'll give money give you pills give you hundred dollar bills"
    and another that goes "I'd rather drink then fuck" thats a good one too
     
  12. EndOfLine

    EndOfLine PLATINUM SPONSOR VIP

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    Lets ask Jason Stadom what he thinks. I think he's in the movies.
     
  13. Chuck Kongo

    Chuck Kongo Well-Known Member

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    ^I forgot that! Howard was entirely befuddled over the whole Anna Nicole Smith saga which happened so long ago (a whopping 6 years ago!). He couldn't remember or get any of that shit straight despite the fact that almost no one followed it and her more intensely than him. He's the one that jumped right on that bandwagon and obsessed daily over her (and her show before it even aired-probably because of E! initially) and then later up until she shuffled off this mortal coil.

    It's gonna be sad (but really funny) in a couple years when Howard's 90-something year old man is officially more "aware" than he is.

    Howard is headed down the path with these other guys who lost it in embarrassing fashion....formerly famous actors running around thinking they are their Tarzan, Dracula, ect. characters after they've lost their marbles.....how long before Howard's permanently addled brain begins to believe he's Fartman?

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  14. tv910

    tv910 Well-Known Member

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    How about last week? After claiming he NEVER "manscapes" any more and doesn't believe in it, Howard said (for at least the 100th time) that his pubic hairs are longer than his dick. The following day he said he DID shave down last night, told the exact same story about his pubes, and acted like he was revealing it for the first time.
     
  15. HowardsPrenup

    HowardsPrenup Well-Known Member

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    :giggle: :jj:
     
  16. Chuck Kongo

    Chuck Kongo Well-Known Member

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    It's actually too bad that Robin had to interrupt and correct him on his Lenny Dykstra "memories".

    If she hadn't, he was probably getting ready to tell some "story" about how, as a kid, his old man would take him to Shea Stadium to watch Lenny Dykstra play for the Mets and this one time he got Lenny's autograph and Lenny signed a ball for him, and blah-blah-blah....lmfao.

    Fucking Larry King all over again. Which will Howard wear first on-air when he completely cracks....a cowboy hat or suspenders?
     
  17. Pigsaw

    Pigsaw Well-Known Member

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    As we all know, Howard has taken up permanent residence in his own reality. The richer he's become, the more insulated he has become. His memories, at least the ones he relates to us on the air, are all fabricated. The memories of his childhood, parents, sister, school, his first marriage, his second marriage (there are at least six versions of how they met) and just about everything else are all designed to make himself the poor victim.
    "Woe is me, I've had such a tough life." It's Howchie's world and we are all just visitors.
     
  18. Bye You!

    Bye You! The n word guy Gold

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    that would have been awesome, as Lenny is 9 years younger than The Wig.

    Good god, Howard is an asshole.
     
  19. IlluminatiJones

    IlluminatiJones New Member

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    I love that phrase. :up:

    Stories of shagging flies with Darryl Strawberry Eddie Murphy are only 2-3 years away, tops.

    It's a fine line he's completely unable to straddle..............................between perennial victim and victor.

    :crazy2:
     
  20. tv910

    tv910 Well-Known Member

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    You'll have to excuse Howard, it's hard to concentrate when you're daydreaming about Jon Hamm's big thick cock.