This ever happen to you?

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Beth143nacho, Oct 27, 2015.

  1. Beth143nacho

    Beth143nacho Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    65,509
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    19,992
    Likes Received:
    16,887
    I'm running about a week on bad luck.

    Last Wednesday, I was patiently waiting in line at my salad bar, already had pulled a soup cup, excited to get some Italian wedding, and the guy in front of me coughs this huge snot into the open soup carafe. I was apparently the only one that saw this, because everyone else kept taking the soup.

    Friday, I was shitting at work when someone frantically ran into the stall next to me, astruggled to pull down their pants and promptly dropped a stream of liquid shit onto the floor, splattering everywhere. How I got out of that without a drop on me, I'll never know.

    Yesterday, I lost money in fantasy football for the first time ever. I only run a lie of about $100 and recovered 94, but a $6 loss is still a loss.... This after trying my buddy's strategy out for the first time. Side note: he tried my strategy and won.

    Today, I get to work, and almost fall into a toilet that's got its seat up. I then realize I had meandered into the ladies room by mistake and am now wondering which of my associates are transgendered...
     
  2. face palm

    face palm Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    63,067
    Joined:
    May 4, 2012
    Messages:
    30,644
    Likes Received:
    8,698
    i stopped reading at salad bar
     
  3. reno

    reno VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    324,691
    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2012
    Messages:
    13,719
    Likes Received:
    40,630
    I hate salad bars.
     
  4. cetiya

    cetiya Lunatic VIP

    Reputations:
    163,403
    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2015
    Messages:
    3,962
    Likes Received:
    10,079
    Geesh. What a shitty life you live!
     
  5. Bye You!

    Bye You! The n word guy Gold

    Reputations:
    339,535
    Joined:
    Sep 3, 2010
    Messages:
    79,567
    Likes Received:
    41,529
    Beth143Nacho takes shits at work...take shits at work...takes shits at work.
     
  6. HS Cult Leader

    HS Cult Leader Elite Member Gold

    Reputations:
    102,044
    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2012
    Messages:
    13,131
    Likes Received:
    18,465
  7. StRyDeRxX

    StRyDeRxX Bling Bling Gold

    Reputations:
    62,068
    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2012
    Messages:
    11,770
    Likes Received:
    12,881
    Buy some life insurance ASAP! :grad:
     
    JonGnagyBeard and IfTheyOnlyKnew like this.
  8. Wiggy

    Wiggy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    18,414
    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2014
    Messages:
    1,856
    Likes Received:
    4,261
    Goddamn, you need some Jesus in your life. Or something.
     
    Cinnaminion and JonGnagyBeard like this.
  9. ljc

    ljc fish sucks on the stick Gold

    Reputations:
    339,855
    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2013
    Messages:
    9,564
    Likes Received:
    59,007
    at Larry inc. we control our own luck @LawyerLarry has his hands on everything and if he is not there @ClintDagger is over seeing the operation i have not had a bad day or even a second since i joined. @MrPPV and @tradioguy69 help run the program it all starts with looking inside your self and if you see any failure when you look in the mirror your not Larry inc. worthy. @EDDIEVRULZ as been hanging with us an he cant stop winning now.
     
  10. lilbuddy67

    lilbuddy67 A man with breath-taking anger management issues Banned User

    Reputations:
    86,104
    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2010
    Messages:
    13,275
    Likes Received:
    15,743
    If you are sitting on a toilet seat ANYWHERE,ANYTIME without looking at it, you have no sympathy.
     
    Icey, Snort, Cinnaminion and 2 others like this.
  11. AllAboutHim Ed

    AllAboutHim Ed #mypurpose VIP

    Reputations:
    134,725
    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2014
    Messages:
    7,247
    Likes Received:
    10,880
    There is 0.0 chance you didn't get shit on your shoes and pants.

    Studies have shown that shit, even when properly dispensed in a toilet, still manages to get on tooth brushes stored in the bathroom.

    Getting shit on and the rest of your bad luck is your bad karma paying you back for not alerting others to the loogie in the soup. That's fucked up that you didn't tell everyone and have it pulled from service. You deserve what you've gotten and more.
     
    Last edited: Oct 27, 2015
  12. AllAboutHim Ed

    AllAboutHim Ed #mypurpose VIP

    Reputations:
    134,725
    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2014
    Messages:
    7,247
    Likes Received:
    10,880
    What a bunch of homos.
     
  13. Skipnoid

    Skipnoid Lick Me!

    Reputations:
    130,457
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    12,544
    Likes Received:
    16,657
    The first two are nasty. Especially the soup. People suck.
     
  14. Skipnoid

    Skipnoid Lick Me!

    Reputations:
    130,457
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    12,544
    Likes Received:
    16,657
    But how can you look at it f your sitting on it? I guess you can see that small section between your thighs though, right? :dontknow:
     
    lilbuddy67 likes this.
  15. Skipnoid

    Skipnoid Lick Me!

    Reputations:
    130,457
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    12,544
    Likes Received:
    16,657
    That's true ... then again, I store my tooth brush up my ass.
     
    AuntDolly likes this.
  16. Skipnoid

    Skipnoid Lick Me!

    Reputations:
    130,457
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    12,544
    Likes Received:
    16,657
    :lol1:
     
    IfTheyOnlyKnew likes this.
  17. JonGnagyBeard

    JonGnagyBeard VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    57,026
    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2015
    Messages:
    2,957
    Likes Received:
    6,516
    No, never happened to me. At least in that order.
     
  18. ClintDagger

    ClintDagger World's #2 Ranked Poster - Exec VP Larry, Inc VIP

    Reputations:
    379,724
    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2014
    Messages:
    15,335
    Likes Received:
    47,967
    Happened to me on the golf course before, it all evens out.
     
    Joe Bauers likes this.
  19. Kool

    Kool Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    32,222
    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2012
    Messages:
    8,630
    Likes Received:
    8,839
    I never had Italian wedding soup
     
  20. ClintDagger

    ClintDagger World's #2 Ranked Poster - Exec VP Larry, Inc VIP

    Reputations:
    379,724
    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2014
    Messages:
    15,335
    Likes Received:
    47,967
    Dark horse POTY candidate right thurr.
     
    ljc likes this.