Politics Updated Fairytales: The Three Little Pigs Were Packing

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by YinzerMasshole, Mar 26, 2016.

  1. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    79,126
    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2014
    Messages:
    3,757
    Likes Received:
    8,175
    Because what's the point of telling your children ghastly old-school bedtime stories if they don't completely align to your special snowflake political beliefs?

    I can't wait to see what happens in the remake of Goldilocks and The Open-Carry Bears.

    NRA Family, the National Rifle Association’s blog for families, recently began publishing a series of classic fairy tales, reimagined to include guns: “Red felt the reassuring weight of the rifle on her shoulder and continued down the path, scanning the trees, knowing that their shadows could provide a hiding place.”

    The series is authored by conservative blogger Amelia Hamilton. “Most of us probably grew up having fairy tales read to us as we drifted off to sleep,” an editor’s note reads. “But how many times have you thought back and realized just how, well, grim some of them are?” (Haha.) “Have you ever wondered what those same fairy tales might sound like if the hapless Red Riding Hoods, Hansels and Gretels had been taught about gun safety and how to use firearms?”

    http://gawker.com/what-if-little-red-riding-hood-had-a-gun-story-time-wi-1767247873
     
  2. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

    Reputations:
    317,672
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2010
    Messages:
    177,742
    Likes Received:
    59,643
    Holy God that is the gayest thing I've ever seen and I once saw a guy suck a cock
     
    Caldwell likes this.
  3. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    79,126
    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2014
    Messages:
    3,757
    Likes Received:
    8,175
    Oh. I suppose "The Three Little Pigs Were Packing" could totally mean something else. My bad.
     
  4. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

    Reputations:
    317,672
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2010
    Messages:
    177,742
    Likes Received:
    59,643
    No, I mean the actual article :jj:
     
    YinzerMasshole likes this.
  5. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    79,126
    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2014
    Messages:
    3,757
    Likes Received:
    8,175
    Either way, it's got the gay.
     
  6. The Finklestein Kid

    The Finklestein Kid Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    10,215
    Joined:
    Sep 3, 2015
    Messages:
    1,582
    Likes Received:
    1,708
    Somebody has too much time on their hands.
     
  7. Rabid Dogman

    Rabid Dogman Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    7,015
    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2014
    Messages:
    1,393
    Likes Received:
    1,853
    I thought I was a staunch supporter of the 2nd Amendment, but since I have never actually pondered this question, I realize now that I am just a poser.
     
  8. Head Censor

    Head Censor Turgid Member VIP

    Reputations:
    394,731
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    10,412
    Likes Received:
    27,115
    Was he able to bring you to completion? ;)
     
  9. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

    Reputations:
    317,672
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2010
    Messages:
    177,742
    Likes Received:
    59,643
    Nah I Never cum from blowjobs
     
  10. superstone

    superstone Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    3,110
    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2014
    Messages:
    439
    Likes Received:
    697
  11. PI Nate

    PI Nate Disenfranchised since 1984... Gold

    Reputations:
    273,593
    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2011
    Messages:
    52,439
    Likes Received:
    52,495
    Once?


    :backlol2:
     
    Skipnoid likes this.
  12. JameGumb

    JameGumb We're all out of toner!

    Reputations:
    229,026
    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2013
    Messages:
    35,903
    Likes Received:
    27,102
    Did you suck him dry until blood came out?
     
  13. Father O'Blivion

    Father O'Blivion Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    68,628
    Joined:
    Apr 13, 2015
    Messages:
    4,001
    Likes Received:
    8,762
    Originally, the story of Goldilocks involved an ugly old woman and three bachelor bears. True story.
     
  14. Dorb

    Dorb Lovable Old Pig VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    127,758
    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2012
    Messages:
    17,725
    Likes Received:
    18,758
    I myself am packing an 8 incher.:D