Politics Updated Fairytales: The Three Little Pigs Were Packing

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by YinzerMasshole, Mar 26, 2016.

  1. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole Well-Known Member

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    Because what's the point of telling your children ghastly old-school bedtime stories if they don't completely align to your special snowflake political beliefs?

    I can't wait to see what happens in the remake of Goldilocks and The Open-Carry Bears.

    NRA Family, the National Rifle Association’s blog for families, recently began publishing a series of classic fairy tales, reimagined to include guns: “Red felt the reassuring weight of the rifle on her shoulder and continued down the path, scanning the trees, knowing that their shadows could provide a hiding place.”

    The series is authored by conservative blogger Amelia Hamilton. “Most of us probably grew up having fairy tales read to us as we drifted off to sleep,” an editor’s note reads. “But how many times have you thought back and realized just how, well, grim some of them are?” (Haha.) “Have you ever wondered what those same fairy tales might sound like if the hapless Red Riding Hoods, Hansels and Gretels had been taught about gun safety and how to use firearms?”

    http://gawker.com/what-if-little-red-riding-hood-had-a-gun-story-time-wi-1767247873
     
  2. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP Gold

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    Holy God that is the gayest thing I've ever seen and I once saw a guy suck a cock
     
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  3. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole Well-Known Member

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    Oh. I suppose "The Three Little Pigs Were Packing" could totally mean something else. My bad.
     
  4. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP Gold

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    No, I mean the actual article :jj:
     
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  5. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole Well-Known Member

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    Either way, it's got the gay.
     
  6. The Finklestein Kid

    The Finklestein Kid Well-Known Member

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    Somebody has too much time on their hands.
     
  7. Rabid Dogman

    Rabid Dogman Well-Known Member

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    I thought I was a staunch supporter of the 2nd Amendment, but since I have never actually pondered this question, I realize now that I am just a poser.
     
  8. Head Censor

    Head Censor Turgid Member VIP

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    Was he able to bring you to completion? ;)
     
  9. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP Gold

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    Nah I Never cum from blowjobs
     
  10. superstone

    superstone Well-Known Member VIP

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  11. PI Nate

    PI Nate Disenfranchised since 1984... Gold

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    Once?


    :backlol2:
     
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  12. JameGumb

    JameGumb We're all out of toner!

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    Did you suck him dry until blood came out?
     
  13. Father O'Blivion

    Father O'Blivion Well-Known Member

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    Originally, the story of Goldilocks involved an ugly old woman and three bachelor bears. True story.
     
  14. Dorb

    Dorb Lovable Old Pig VIP

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    I myself am packing an 8 incher.:D