Too bad the asshole wasn't successful. http://www.cnn.com/2014/10/17/justice/mma-fighter-suicide-attempt/index.html?hpt=hp_t2 ****************** MMA fighter War Machine attempts suicide in jail, report says (CNN) -- Mixed martial arts fighter Jonathan Koppenhaver, who is accused of beating up his ex-girlfriend, tried to kill himself in a Las Vegas jail, authorities said. Koppenhaver, 32, is known as War Machine on the MMA circuit. He allegedly beat adult film actress Christy Mack and a male friend on August 8 -- then went on the run. checks at the detention center found him unresponsive in his cell on Tuesday, according to CNN affiliate KSNV. Suicide note He was found seated on the floor with a torn piece of linen around his neck, which was attached to his bunk, Officer Jose Hernandez told the affiliate. Koppenhaver, who was unresponsive and struggling to breathe, had left behind a suicide note. Hernandez cut the linen and called medical personnel, who later cleared the fighter and put him on suicide watch at a medical isolation unit. Details of his suicide note were not released. The incident occurred on the same day he was supposed to appear in court to discuss a plea deal, according to the affiliate. 'I'm so cursed' Koppenhaver has said that he'd gone to surprise his ex-girlfriend with a ring when he found her with another man. "I only wish that man hadn't been there and that Christy & I would be happily engaged," he posted on Twitter in August. "I don't know y I'm so cursed. One day truth will come out." He is facing various charges, including domestic battery and attempted murder.