Website Will Find Canadian Soulmate For Those Fleeing Trump

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by BethSucks, May 11, 2016.

  1. BethSucks

    BethSucks Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Site helps those fleeing Trump find Canadian soulmate
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    File photo - (REUTERS/Chris Helgren)

    Looking for true love? Thinking of fleeing to Canada if Donald Trump wins the general election in November? Now you can take care of both in one fell swoop thanks to a site that promises to "make dating great again," Global Newsreports.


    Maple Match "makes it easy for Americans to find the ideal Canadian partner to save them from the unfathomable horror of a Trump presidency," per the site—a mission that CEO Joe Goldman says is just part of the Great White North's neighborly duties.

    "As Barack Obama said during Justin Trudeau's official welcoming ceremony at the White House, 'We're two different countries, but we're like one big town," Goldman says.

    "Our side [of] this 'town' happens to have a megalomaniac trying to seize power, so we're naturally concerned." Goldman insists this isn't a spoof. "Donald Trump is a joke," he tells Cosmopolitan.

    "Finding true love in a place where you can be happy is not a joke. Maple Match is very real." There's already a waiting list for the site, which hasn't started matching anyone yet, and Goldman tells Tech Times there've been more than 4,500 signups in just four days' time.

    (A Maple Match couple's ideal first date: Cheetos tacos and "America" beer?)
     
  2. BethSucks

    BethSucks Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    TheMercenary likes this.
  3. Daveindiego

    Daveindiego Confirmed Internet Legend Banned User

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    Will they hook me up with some hot chick in Vancouver that loves to smoke weed and bang? :smile:
     
  4. Shivvy

    Shivvy VIP Extreme Gold

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    Mail order brides :jj:

    Canadians are so desperate
     
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  5. Domo Cup

    Domo Cup Well-Known Member

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    Lots of cucks in Canada.
     
  6. ClintDagger

    ClintDagger The REAL Nature Boy - Exec VP Larry, Inc VIP

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    Yeah it's not exactly the best and the brightest threatening to leave. They are desperate indeed.
     
  7. HowieStearn

    HowieStearn Well-Known Member

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    good. living up there in a over-priced frozen socialist wasteland is what you deserve. dont come back :hw: pack an extra sweater assholes
     
  8. BethSucks

    BethSucks Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    What's the status of weed in Canada?
     
  9. Slow

    Slow Well-Known Member Banned User

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    We're totally gonna score in Canada when the chicks see how in check our white privilege is

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    Last edited: May 11, 2016
  10. johnfreeman1

    johnfreeman1 Well-Known Member

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    Bunch of cuckolds

    Have fun in Canada
     
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  11. YinzerMasshole

    YinzerMasshole Thread Vandal Banned User

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    ...but they'll hook you up with "Calgary Ted" Cruz.
     
  12. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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    I joined and it matched me up with Lever :mad:
     
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  13. RH Goatcabin

    RH Goatcabin Time to pulsate. Time to yearn. 2010 OG POTY The Bar Gold

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    I'm an American. Sign me up