Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by chapped, May 3, 2013.
We have all been there....
What is the worst thing you have done to get laid??
this will be the best answer
Married a young hooker and allowed her to bring a bunch of mangey animals into my palatial homes.
paid for it.
Shit, no wait ...I spelled that wrong. Rupees. I gave an Indian hooker 100 rupees if I could cum on her dot.
I felt awful afterwards. Just awful.
I've been begging forever and ever.
Still no luck. Sucks to be fugly.
opened a day care...
Went to an ATM, withdrew a fist full of twenties and handed it to a young lady that may or may not have had a substance abuse problem.
shame on me for laughing
Heres a story to rival the obvious winner of getting married:
Out of high school I was making tons of cash and the girl I was dating turned into a pillhead (south florida, home of the oxycontin express). Luckily for me, her hotter older sister also turned into a pillhead (seeing this chick for the first time in high school made me pursue the younger one). I eventually got friendly with them both, and once the money ran dry for them, they were doing anything to "pay bills". These two chicks came over so high that they promised me a 3some..a 3some with TWO GORGEOUS SISTERS if I ponied up some cash. I let em ride to the bank with me n watch me pull $800 from the ATM. I put the money away, fucked them both at the same time, and by that time we were so high I just swore I already gave them the money. Next day, pulled out $800 from the glovebox of my Mercedes. WINNING!!!
Do you still have their numbers? I have $800 im willing to part with.
They both have kids and became Christian. Shocking....right?
NEVEERRR date a christian broad, shes done some dirty shit in her lifetime.
Locked out the girl I was kind of beginning to date, so I could get with some other floozy. She was outside banging on the door, while I was inside banging on a whore. Ooooowwwwe
Went to a really bad neighborhood - and then when I got to her apartment, I saw huge cockroaches on the floor. Began to think that if she lived in such squalor, she probably had bad hygiene too and her pussy would smell like horseshit on a hot day. Made up some bullshit excuse and got the hell out of there.
Ding, Ding, Ding. Winner!!!