When did you learn the truth about Santa Claus?

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Johnny B, Oct 27, 2012.

  1. Johnny B

    Johnny B Active Member

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    The past few weeks I have been listening to a lot of Christmas carols, so I bring up the question…

    When did you learn the revelation that Santa did not exist?

    I was in the third grade. I wanted a drum set for Christmas and about a week or so before Christmas I overheard my parents talking about how when my mom picked something up it filled up the entire car and barely fit, that brought up a few questions in my head.

    On Christmas Eve at my grandma’s house I was playing video games with my cousins the entire time and didn’t eat anything. Later on that night when I got home I was really hungry and snuck into the kitchen and was eating chocolate cupcake frosting from a can when I heard my noisy parents putting the drum set together. I didn’t confront them, but I knew what the deal was.. a few hours later I woke up and acted surprised when I saw the drums.

    It wasn’t an earth shattering ordeal, I guess for a little while up til then I sort of realized it…
     
  2. SleepingWarrior

    SleepingWarrior Well-Known Member VIP

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    6 I think. Sniffed the sham out early on my own. Can't hide shit in an apartment.
     
  3. dexterdog

    dexterdog Well-Known Member

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    THERE'S NO SANTA CLAUS?? What the fuck are you talking about???
     
  4. newcastlefan

    newcastlefan גֵּרְשֹׁם VIP

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    what truth?
     
  5. slats7

    slats7 Well-Known Member

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    4th grade or so. My parents did a poor job of hiding the gifts that they had bought. Plus, older kids at school start to blab.
    On a related note, I was 44 when I learned that Howard's hair wasn't real.
     
  6. openmike11

    openmike11 New Member

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    When I seen him fucking my mom...
     
  7. lilbuddy67

    lilbuddy67 A man with breath-taking anger management issues Banned User

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    I left a stocking up, and milk and cookies. The next morning, everything was still there, untouched. Must've been 7 y.o. ......
     
  8. MISERABLE66

    MISERABLE66 Well-Known Member

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    I think I was 7 when I realized. I remember being at my grandparents house for xmas eve. We left that night and on the way to the train station my mother stopped in a store and bought some wrapping paper. The next morning when I woke up to rip open my gifts, I noticed they were all wrapped in that same paper she had just bought.

    Later that day I asked my mother "why were all the gifts wrapped in the paper you just bought?" (I only asked to see what she would say) and she said because Santa was so busy that he dropped off the gifts and asked her to wrap them for him. LOL
     
  9. stripes

    stripes Active Member Banned User

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    bad santa clued me into life
     
  10. Beth Eats Hay

    Beth Eats Hay Well-Known Member

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    Hey, buddy - how about using a spoiler alert?
     
  11. h89fvh8dfha8hfv9a0

    h89fvh8dfha8hfv9a0 Xavier's water boy Banned User

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    Just now.

    Thanks a lot.
     
  12. Herc

    Herc New Member

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    When the Heeb grown up next door ruined it for me as a child . . .
     
  13. Beets Teeth

    Beets Teeth Active Member

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    Now I know why everyone hates Shuli.
     
  14. WholeAssholeOut

    WholeAssholeOut Member

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    i was seven. we had to return one of my gifts because the doll basically fell apart. my parents told me the deal but i had found the gifts in the garage like a week earlier. ever read the children's story the polar express about how a train comes on christmas and takes this little boy to meet santa claus in the north pole? i came up with this story and told my sister (to explain the changed gift) that there was also an after-christmas polar express for returning faulty and damaged gifts. i told her it had picked me up and i'd met santa claus and he gave me a new doll. she flipped and told all her friends and thought it was SOOOO COOOL and believed it for YEARS. she pretty much hates me for that among other things.

    i started having my doubts about santa when i didn't get what i really wanted for christmas the year before which was this toy car carwash where when you put the cars in hot water they turned to look dirty and then when the carwash sprayed cold water on them they looked clean again, not some stupid damn doll every year.
     
    Last edited: Oct 27, 2012
  15. BethsZygote

    BethsZygote In Utero VIP

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    about 4th grade.

    When i was in kindergarden i thought he left me a volcano... it turned out to be a stuffed Alf.

    [​IMG]

    i was only slightly disappointed


















    [​IMG]
     
  16. CCMaguire

    CCMaguire Well-Known Member VIP

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    I was 7 when I figured out that my mom's handwriting looked exactly like Santa's in his "Thank you for the milk and cookies" note. The gig was up. I played along for a couple of more years though.
     
  17. RenchFries

    RenchFries Official Dawgshed Dutch representative Gold

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    I dunno, I think I was 7 or so. I was pissed and it made me cry because it was such an awesome story.

    That was the day I lost the innocence of being a child.
     
  18. Viddy Well

    Viddy Well New Member

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    Around age 5. Me and my sis caught my mother in the act.