News White House Seeks Out Actor For Assistance Assuring Legacy

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  1. Javaforgotme

    Javaforgotme Well-Known Member Banned User

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    Washington, D.C – Washington Times

    Thursday, October 1, 2015 The Secret Service, tonight confirmed the authorized abduction and sequester of actor Christopher Lloyd for the purpose of national security.

    When contacted at his undisclosed house-arrest location, Mr. Lloyd confirmed his abduction. “Last night around 2 AM L.A.-time I was woken up by a pounding at my front door. When I opened the door there stood 2 men with dark suits and wearing sunglasses, which was odd, considering the time. The men identified themselves as Secret Service Agents, working at the behest of President Obama. After my eyes adjusted to the light of my porch, I noticed the shorter Agent was holding forward in his hands the lab coat and white wig I wore in the Back to the Future films. At least it appeared to be the same.

    I asked them if this was a joke, but they explained that President Obama has approved an Executive Order to sequester me under House Arrest. I asked why, and they told me Obama needed me to take him to the future! I said, ‘ Guys, you know that was a movie, right?’. They said that they knew it was a movie, and the President had been binge watching the three movies back to back since his trip to the UN. The taller agent said that Obama knows his legacy is in great danger, because of the Russian action in Syria, as well as other recent problems, like the Iran agreement – and the President believes the only way to assure his legacy is to move immediately to the day after the next election, to November 9, 2016. And the President believes that I, as Doc Brown, could bring him into that future date using the DeLorean from the movie. He’s even got Steven Spielberg hooked into this.

    I explained to the Agents that I couldn’t help them, but they insisted and will not me leave my house until I produce the DeLorean so they can take me, and that car back to Washington.”

    I demanded to speak to the President – and one of the Agents handed me a Blackberry phone – when I said hello I heard the President’s voice. ‘Doc – you’ve got to take me back to the future - to right after the next election. I don’t even give a shit who wins. I just need to end my term without the world falling apart, and you’re the only one who can help me.’ Mr. President, I wish I could help you but I am an actor, and I have no idea how to really go forward in time. The President then said that he knew I could figure it out, and to call him Marty!'


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  2. HS Cult Leader

    HS Cult Leader Elite Member Gold

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