I've finished my first beer. It may have been the last one in the fridge. Don't get up. I'll go check.
Update: beer found! Last bottle. But take heart -- there's like a bottle of fermented rice water or some shit in the on-deck circle.
I started drinking at my family dinner today. Continued through the Eagles game. (wooot!) and I still have most of my case left... plus a couple Stellas and a St.Pauli Girl.