Why don't hockey teams just hire big fat guys to play goalie?

Discussion in 'The Bar' started by Scott, Nov 3, 2013.

  1. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    You telling me if a guy like animalgod or even someone bigger is in front of the goal you'd be able to get a puck past him?

    [​IMG]
     
  2. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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    [video=youtube;sP8ZVWiZUMA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sP8ZVWiZUMA[/video]
     
  3. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    He was too tall. I'm talking about a rounder guy. Like the first one only able to get out of bed. He could just lie in front of the net. No need to even move.
     
  4. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    I think the video pretty much answered your question.
     
  5. Jim J Jiblets

    Jim J Jiblets #Hillary'sTongue

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  6. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    I'm not convinced.
     
  7. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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    They said he covered 90% of the net, but that was with out pads. So he probably would cover the whole net in full goalie dress.

    You sweat a ton playing goalie. A lot of them lose 5-10 pounds a game. So maybe a fat guy would have a heart attack or something?
     
  8. Popeye Saavedra

    Popeye Saavedra Well-Known Member

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    Why don't they just get that Precious chick to play goalie and tell her the puck is a Ding Dong?
     
  9. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    Even better. As long as he falls down in front of the goal. They can move him at the end of the game.
     
  10. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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  11. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    Hey, he had a 1.000 OBP.
     
  12. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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    Dustin Pedroia does NOT have a 1.000 OBP.
     
  13. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    Exactly. That's why they should plop this dude down in front of the goal.

    [​IMG]
    I think I've proven my point.
     
  14. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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    If anything, I would be interested to see if some minor league team pulled this stunt and see if it works.

    I don't think anybody is 4ft tall sitting down, so i think there would be enough net to hit for pros.
     
  15. Danas Boyfrien

    Danas Boyfrien Mediocre Negro Gold

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    He might get the puck stuck under one of his titties.
     
  16. Obi Drunkenobe

    Obi Drunkenobe Well-Known Member VIP

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    I remember awhile back goalie pad sizes were getting out of control. I think the NHL had to make rules about how big they could go. That would have been a better solution put a fit guy in humongous pads.
     
  17. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    That would be cheating.
     
  18. Avery

    Avery Well-Known Member Banned User

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    They placed new restrictions for this season, but i don't think it goes far enough.

    I mean, c'mon.

    He looks like he's disarming a bomb in Fallujah.


    [​IMG]
     
  19. Obi Drunkenobe

    Obi Drunkenobe Well-Known Member VIP

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    NHL wants a more offensive league. I think they are right. I'm still happy about them getting rid of the red line.
     
  20. Scott

    Scott Masshole Staff Member

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    Do you think they should ban beards?