WTF Why haven't beds been built to withstand sex?

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by Shivvy, Mar 21, 2016.

  1. Shivvy

    Shivvy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    95,902
    Joined:
    May 23, 2011
    Messages:
    136,220
    Likes Received:
    62,603
    You figure by now they'd redesign it to have some more give for the rocking. Over time it feels like it's gonna break and starts squeaking
     
  2. Walygatr

    Walygatr Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    38,525
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    10,033
    Likes Received:
    28,433
    Because there's too many people as it is.
     
  3. johnfreeman1

    johnfreeman1 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    11
    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2015
    Messages:
    4,268
    Likes Received:
    11,365
    Nothing to do with you being a fat pig
     
  4. Dick Fitzwell

    Dick Fitzwell Opinions are like assholes ... and so am I

    Reputations:
    4,360
    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    6,698
    Likes Received:
    15,073
    Who needs beds? I'm waiting for them to create handles for the wife on the bathroom sink.
     
    Mr Cachexic and Shivvy like this.
  5. HypocriteHowie

    HypocriteHowie VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    11,064
    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2012
    Messages:
    5,677
    Likes Received:
    16,915
    Maybe Mrs Shivvy loosened the bolts so that she can say no, she doesn't trust that the bed is safe enough for sex.
     
    Shivvy likes this.
  6. Birddog

    Birddog Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    557
    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Messages:
    1,885
    Likes Received:
    3,645
    You're not having sex Shiv.
     
    Mr Cachexic and Shivvy like this.
  7. Vincenzo69

    Vincenzo69 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    669
    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2015
    Messages:
    14,888
    Likes Received:
    18,611
    That's why you fuck on the couch or the floor or you take your wife or girlfriend, stand up and bend her over
     
  8. reno

    reno VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    43,802
    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2012
    Messages:
    14,808
    Likes Received:
    44,513
    Tell her she can suck your dick standing up.
     
  9. yaddc

    yaddc Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    23,407
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    28,364
    Likes Received:
    26,210
    Beds were made for 1-2-3- sex
     
  10. yaddc

    yaddc Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    23,407
    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2014
    Messages:
    28,364
    Likes Received:
    26,210
    Or maybe they were made for sleeping
     
  11. Mugsy

    Mugsy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    229
    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2013
    Messages:
    1,817
    Likes Received:
    3,670
    The beds are fine, the fat asses fucking on them is the problem.
     
    Mr Cachexic and FishySausage like this.
  12. bluedevil30

    bluedevil30 Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    23,836
    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2015
    Messages:
    7,026
    Likes Received:
    11,623
    Spring for a real bed frame not a cheapo one you get for free with mattresses.
     
    FishySausage likes this.
  13. The Snork

    The Snork VIP Extreme Gold

    Reputations:
    23,214
    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2012
    Messages:
    8,004
    Likes Received:
    12,896
    Get some steel bed supports. My wife was freaked out by the bed squeaking when my mother-in-law moved in. And my advice to "channel her inner whore" fell on deaf ears.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  14. FishySausage

    FishySausage Original Nuttah VIP Gold

    Reputations:
    33,452
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2010
    Messages:
    16,541
    Likes Received:
    29,269
    Yep. If you don't buy you bed at ikea (or worse) you won't have any problems.
    I've never felt like I was going to break my bed (and we go at it!)
    But then again I'm 180 and the wife's like 115
     
  15. captbill

    captbill Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    1,689
    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2013
    Messages:
    2,407
    Likes Received:
    2,716
    LOL! When i see a really fat, 400 lbs + each, I often say to my wife, "Can you imagine them in bed having sex?" :)

    That really pisses here off, which was the point of my comment in the first place. :haha:
     
  16. DrSublux

    DrSublux Who am dis VIP

    Reputations:
    14,615
    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2010
    Messages:
    27,043
    Likes Received:
    15,219
    you are not supposed to fuck your wife in the crib
     
  17. Divorce Chicken

    Divorce Chicken Willy one plunge VIP

    Reputations:
    26,868
    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2012
    Messages:
    17,363
    Likes Received:
    39,809
    @rhgoatcabin
     
  18. Shivvy

    Shivvy Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    95,902
    Joined:
    May 23, 2011
    Messages:
    136,220
    Likes Received:
    62,603

    Sink sex is the best
     
    Dick Fitzwell likes this.