Wig: "If Beth had a talk show..."

Discussion in 'The Howard Stern Show' started by HooHoo, Nov 27, 2013.

  1. HooHoo

    HooHoo Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    26,480
    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2012
    Messages:
    5,430
    Likes Received:
    6,135
    Anyone hear this frightening sequence of words fall out of the Wig's mouth? I was just skipping around an mp3 of one of the shows last week and there it was... ""If Beth had a talk show..." My god, just the thought of it ranks right up there with putting on a pair of dirty underwear, AIDS, or 24 hours of Polyphonic Spree..

    Can you imagine tuning in, and... Oh wow. There it is again. A remarkably vibrant & living boredom. There she is rambling on about Skyping with her pets, and it just covered you like paint: boredom to the point of brain damage. Like literally, physically, there has been some kind of a shutdown, the nervous system has disconnected from the brain, you can't move your arms as you're laying there on the couch paralyzed like Kim underneath Kanye wanting him to just get it over with. You are Christopher Reeves and the only thing missing is the feeding tube and you're not doing anything

    God, can you imagine. She's almost a drooling thing, she's missing a section of her brain that only a few people notice.. But Buchwald & Wig will find a way to bring Television America new levels of mind-rotting substance not seen before.

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Nov 27, 2013
  2. Nemo

    Nemo Beer Can Thick Gold

    Reputations:
    339,542
    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2010
    Messages:
    94,550
    Likes Received:
    58,665
    greatest show ever?
    :yay:
     
  3. Mark Mayonnaise

    Mark Mayonnaise You look like a tree! VIP

    Reputations:
    317,675
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2010
    Messages:
    177,742
    Likes Received:
    59,644
  4. datchguy

    datchguy New Member Banned User

    Reputations:
    -132
    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2012
    Messages:
    13,446
    Likes Received:
    8
    It would be shitcanned quicker than The Chatter.
     
  5. chapped

    chapped Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    384,616
    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2012
    Messages:
    55,632
    Likes Received:
    61,906
    i disagree... any venue that would require her to speak her own thoughts would be amazing...

    think about how bad she would make herself look

    i say give it to her asap
     
  6. MrWarmth

    MrWarmth ADORABLE DEPLORABLE Gold

    Reputations:
    176,399
    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2010
    Messages:
    90,645
    Likes Received:
    41,248
    "....even deaf people would be outraged"
     
  7. Afganistand

    Afganistand Motivationally Deficient VIP

    Reputations:
    42,204
    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2011
    Messages:
    3,550
    Likes Received:
    5,070
    More content and gifs for the Shed!

    :yay:
     
  8. GaryPuppet

    GaryPuppet Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    246,262
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    25,366
    Likes Received:
    48,966
    The animated gifs that Nemo would make from such a show would be internet/dawgshed GOLD!
     
  9. MrWarmth

    MrWarmth ADORABLE DEPLORABLE Gold

    Reputations:
    176,399
    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2010
    Messages:
    90,645
    Likes Received:
    41,248
    Short straw amongst the sound engineers gets her show
     
  10. harlock

    harlock ancora imparo Gold

    Reputations:
    75,023
    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2012
    Messages:
    33,560
    Likes Received:
    7,278
    if there is a God...:pray:
     
  11. GaryPuppet

    GaryPuppet Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    246,262
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    25,366
    Likes Received:
    48,966
    Maybe howard would make scott the engineer work on her show for free like he did with Emily's shitty Zoo Za Zoo album.

    Oh wait. Howard bought him a cheap 300 perfect game bowling ring as a thank you.

    What a swell guy Stern is.
     
  12. MrWarmth

    MrWarmth ADORABLE DEPLORABLE Gold

    Reputations:
    176,399
    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2010
    Messages:
    90,645
    Likes Received:
    41,248
    The Beverly Hillbillies had more panache
     
  13. DaBUU

    DaBUU Active Member

    Reputations:
    15
    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2012
    Messages:
    2,352
    Likes Received:
    6
    The horse face is strong in this picture



    [​IMG]
     
  14. MrWarmth

    MrWarmth ADORABLE DEPLORABLE Gold

    Reputations:
    176,399
    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2010
    Messages:
    90,645
    Likes Received:
    41,248
    Tv channels are taking ANYTHING for content these days just to fill the time. If some cuckold is shelling out the bucks, hey money is money
     
  15. Uncle Larry

    Uncle Larry Well-Known Member VIP

    Reputations:
    53,900
    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2011
    Messages:
    4,447
    Likes Received:
    7,683
    Beth can't even keep the Extra correspondent type gigs that Howard and Don arranged, but it would be great forum content if they convinced an obscure cable network to give her a talk show.
     
  16. FCCstandards

    FCCstandards Non-Essential Salooner VIP

    Reputations:
    22,154
    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2011
    Messages:
    17,324
    Likes Received:
    4,833
    Let's not even joke around about this :shitfit:
     
  17. GaryPuppet

    GaryPuppet Well-Known Member

    Reputations:
    246,262
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2012
    Messages:
    25,366
    Likes Received:
    48,966
  18. ohmicah

    ohmicah Real Gad About Town

    Reputations:
    12
    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2012
    Messages:
    8,318
    Likes Received:
    3,726
    Frank Zappa sure knew this type of woman:

    [video=youtube;F6s_GPqPQsU]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6s_GPqPQsU[/video]

    You are the girl
    Somebody invented
    In a grim little office
    On Madison Ave.

    They were specific
    They made you terrific:
    Red lips;
    Blue eyes;
    Blonde hair;
    Un-wise -
    You're All-American,
    And, darling, they said so

    What?

    Her head's full of bubbles;
    Her nose is petite!
    She looks like she never
    Gets nothin' to eat!

    'N she dines with actors,
    'N Wall Street characters:
    Dull talk;
    Nice clothes -
    See her?
    She blows -
    (She's so important
    'Cause he gets to do talk shows -)


    She has moved up now;
    She's come a long way -
    They give her bunches
    Of words she can say!

    When she's in a bold mood,
    "Confinement Loaf" sounds good -
    That's right,
    She's wrong!
    Let's end
    Her song

    (It seems she's everywhere
    We just can't escape her -
    Is this a miracle of pure evolution?
    And all the yuppie boys, they dream they will rape her -
    She brings the BUS RIDE
    To a thrilling conclusion!)
     
  19. PelicanWig

    PelicanWig Beautiful Soup

    Reputations:
    54,302
    Joined:
    May 24, 2013
    Messages:
    7,208
    Likes Received:
    8,674
    I would love logging in here every day excited to check out what a ratings disaster it is
     
  20. MrWarmth

    MrWarmth ADORABLE DEPLORABLE Gold

    Reputations:
    176,399
    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2010
    Messages:
    90,645
    Likes Received:
    41,248
    "I could NEVER compare myself to the greats like Jackie Carson and Marv Griffith and Jimmy Springer"