I just purchased the audio version, which features narration by an embarrassed David Spade. David seems to be reading the book for his very first time as he narrates, and appears to lose confidence in the material just pages into it. The story opens with an imposing, bossy Yoda yelling at everyone for having fun. Children everywhere will wonder to themselves if Yoda's sad heart was worth saving in the first place, as he has taken on the demeanor of a drill sergeant in the year since the miracle: Boy readers will find themselves uncontrollably beating off to Yoda's MILF, introduced from behind in a dress with piping that traces her panty line: Buddy is drawn without eyes, but nobody seems to notice. Given Buddy's eagerness to follow Yoda's many house rules, and his popularity among the kittens -- who are relieved to meet an older cat who doesn't constantly shout at them -- Yoda sees in Buddy a potential good cop to his bad cop, and deputizes him as a fellow rule enforcer. The two cats soon develop a morning routine of napping together -- a tasteful way of saying the two are homosexual lovers, which even the slowest 5-year-old will appreciate. Beth brings in a new kitten who isn't as attractive as the others, so Yoda's cruel fosters -- led by the cunty Molly, named after Jimmy Kimmel's wife -- torture him like he was a gunky Jewish kid in an all-black Long Island neighborhood. Yoda and Buddy don't seem to care about all this bullying until Buddy gets splashed by water during an especially intense hazing. Kids will be on the edge of their seat as the kind-hearted Buddy joins Yoda on the Dark Side: But guess what? Buddy doesn't murder everyone in the room after the splash incident. Instead, he reveals to them that the reason he has no eyes is because he's blind! He shames the cute kittens for treating the ugly (itself a disability) one differently, and from then on they all act as though they've learned an important lesson about love. They even pretend to like the ugly one by celebrating "Frankie Fridays." Beth's voice appears at the end, when she reads her dedication: I was hoping she would read her "story behind the story" claims as well, but that's just way too many words for her: My favorite line: "While our rescue cat, Yoda, was still holding down the fort in the foster room, it was the new foster, Buddy, who was the fun one, teaching the others about unconditional love." Expect her to use this key phrase in promotional appearances where talk show hosts will pretend it's believable. Beth acknowledges in this smaller print that kids and parents alike will ignore that Buddy no longer lives with her -- he lives with his vet now. And it's a good thing she didn't include that in the story, because children need to believe that those kittens still have a kind-hearted blind cat protecting them from the mean-hearted Yoda.